What can I say, how can I, a mere mortal, put into words just what Bob is. Those who have played with him, and at football, will appreciate that this man is to posing what Chris Brown is to calendars.

Bob, the original 'poison dwarf', has only failed to become a professional footballer or film star because he has a problem with his legs.

They won't carry him past a mirror.

Bob came to us from the Toll knackers yard on a free transfer, and has won his way into the hearts and wallets of all except Roger, who has yet to buy him a drink.

World renowned for his sense of humour, Bob once told two different jokes in one week !